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So scrub up and snap on the gloves; it’s time to get all up in them guts.

Doctor Nerd Love, I need your advice to get me out of a very negative mindset.

“If that were true, they would be lowering their standards. In fact, she notes that older women are a lot more selective than older men and younger women are when it comes to picking a partner If anything, it’s more of a level playing field when it comes to midlife dating.

In a talk before boomers (you can watch it below), Adshade says older women really aren’t disadvantaged on the dating market.

This is why there are a of false positives in online dating. I have confided in my best female friend, who’s in a relationship. When I expressed the amount I get rejected, she was taken aback, and said “Women are silly – and that’s coming from a feminist”. I hear this a from people who believe that they’re the kings of compartmentalization, who believe that they have mastered the poker face and have so squeezed their negative attitude down that nobody ever sees it. This whole Harvey Weinstein thing has, rightly, exposed a gender inequality in which women frequently feel sexually endangered.

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That isn’t true for my three girlfriends, but it’s true for me.

If you mean “women don’t make the first move,” then you’re missing a critical factor: a lot of guys react to women who flaunt or invert gender roles.

When women make the first move on the wrong guy, one of two things happens. Or it may mean that you make a good first impression, but they just weren’t attracted to you, sexually or physically. – The instant gratification culture, a lack of recognition that it takes some time to get to know someone, and develop chemistry, and that men need more than one date to achieve this.

So, I’m going to break in here right at the start: this is a good thing to recognize in yourself.

Realizing that you’re holding on to negative, self-limiting beliefs is an important step in overcoming them. Physically attractive, tall and fit, non smoker, social drinker, intelligent (masters qualified), undertaking a career that corresponds with my education level, and cultured, with a strong interest in many of the arts, along with active competition in sport (i’m a cyclist) to a high amateur level.

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